Darlene was a thirty-seven-year-old alcoholic who was extremely depressed and close to losing her job. Muscle testing revealed her Target List as follows:
- PAST OR CHILDHOOD TRAUMA
- Age six. She was physically and emotionally abused by her father.
- Womb. First trimester. Dad forced sex on Mom. Darlene experienced great fear.
- Age four. Dad slapped Mom. Darlene felt more fear.
- Age seven. Dad slapped Darlene. More fear and pain.
- GRIEF AND LOSS
- Age seventeen. Her father died. She wrote a goodbye letter and read it to me.
- Age twenty-one. Her close friend committed suicide. She wrote a goodbye letter and we included a visualization process.
- SEXUAL ABUSE
- Age twenty-one. She was raped by an acquaintance. She blamed herself for this.
- Age eleven. A lecherous uncle hugged her repeatedly, pressing her against his erections. She didn’t know how to deal with him.
- Age twenty-two. She had an abusive sexual relationship with a boyfriend.
- TOXIC SHAME
- Age nine. Playing with boys, she was tricked into exposing herself and was laughed at and humiliated.
- Age eight. Dad was physically abusing Mom. Darlene tried to rescue Mom and got hit as well.
- ABUSIVE RAGE
- Age twenty-five to twenty-seven. Her first husband was a “rage-aholic” and physically abusive to her. She left him.
- Age ten. She and her brother went exploring on a camping trip. Her father, who couldn’t find them, thought they got lost, and flew into a rage when they returned. He threatened, and belittled them.
Her goals for treatment included:
- I get over my depression.
- I take good care of myself.
- I accept other people just the way they are.
She tested weak on these at the start, indicating they were valid objectives. We cleared everything on her Target List. Then she tested strong all her treatment goals, confirming our progress. At the end of our work, she commented:
I’ve been in therapy five or six times. It was all just talk or taking tests. I used to lie to my therapist. That’s why I wanted to work with you – you found a way of getting the truth.
This was truly amazing to me! My head is clearer, and people say I sound better. I feel not just relaxed, but relieved, and much more centered. Also, I’ve been able to say No without guilt, and that’s a new feeling for me.
At a two year follow up she was still sober and doing well.
Linda said she had no reason to live because of the way she’d been treated by men. She didn’t respond well to reassurance or comfort, perhaps because she couldn’t stop crying long enough to think about a positive future.
Carrying her own box of tissues in the hospital, she often stormed out of group, overwhelmed with tears. When she wasn’t crying, she was belligerent and hostile. I didn’t have a particularly good rapport with her, but decided we should use e.c.c. anyway.
I showed her muscle testing, and she was immediately intrigued – so much so that she briefly stopped crying. She tested strong on “I want to die,” and weak on “I want to live,” – exactly the opposite of what we wanted.
For her top priority item her system took us back to age nine, when she first developed her physical problem that caused her limp. Her father, who was sure she was malingering to get sympathy, demanded that she walk correctly. When Linda couldn’t, he beat her badly. The emotions involved were fear, pain, and shame, and the trauma rated extreme.
I was hopeful that this clearing might pull her out of her misery. Afterward, she turned around with a puzzled look on her face, eyeing me almost suspiciously. Then she again burst into tears. Reaching for the tissue box, she exclaimed that episode was just the start of her many brutal rejections by men. I told her to make a list of those and bring it to our next session.
Her list enumerated four more rejections – her first husband, a brief relationship, her second husband, and a con-man boyfriend. Her system indicated that we could clear the entire pattern. I gathered the necessary information, and verified the weaknesses in her system.
After the clearing I nervously waited for her to turn around. When she finally did, she was wearing a big smile and her eyes, while tear-streaked, were glowing.
“This is what I came here for,” she said. And she gave me a hug. Judging from her manner, re- checking everything was only a formality.
She tested strong on all of the incidents of rejection, and I encouraged her to share her list in group. On “I want to die,” she was now weak, and on “I want to live,” she was now strong, indicating that her suicidality was past. She confirmed this was true. She left her box of tissues in my office, and remained smiling until her discharge.